Suzy Q Homemaker

1. Name of magazine.

New Beginnings.

2. Do you subscribe or just buy it now and then?

I receive my subscription as a part of my membership to La Leche League.

3. What’s your favorite regular feature in the magazine?

I enjoy reading the personal stories submitted by readers. To hear about all of the struggles that some women have had to overcome just to be able to breastfeed amazes and inspires me.

4. What do you think your interest in this magazine says about you?

My interest in this magazine further emphasizes the fact that I'm a die-hard lactivist.

5. How long have you been reading this magazine?

I've been reading them ever since I started attending LLL meetings in 2006, though I've only started receiving my own since November or December of 2007.

6. Is there any unique or quirky aspect to the magazine that keeps you reading?

The whole magazine is unique. I think that it's probably the only magazine in the world dedicated to breastfeeding. Although my "baby" is two and potty-trained, he still nurses. Reading stories in New Beginnings about nursing toddlers provides me with a sense of support that I wouldn't otherwise get.

So before word gets out and I have to defend myself, I want to take a moment and write a disclaimer:

I am a Creative Memories consultant. You all know that already and know that I feel very strongly about what I do as a consultant. I love album-making for the time I get to spend with my older sister and the good times we have together when we scrapbook with our friends.

I am also a lactivist. You all know that if you've been reading my blog.

It's my fault for not catching up with my Home Office news until this morning and when I finally did, I discovered that Creative Memories is a paid sponsor for the Nestle Very Best Baby program. You can imagine my horror when I found this out. The campaign began last month and will last through August 2008.

I guess I'm writing this because I want all of my customers to know that although I am a consultant, I do not like the fact that my company is participating in this campaign. It's beyond my control.

However, I am planning on (somehow) organizing a fundraiser to support my local LLL group. Where or when, I don't know because I just thought of it this morning.

Friday, Jamie's cousin had her baby so I've been worried to the point of exhaustion. Can't go into any details, but she's been trying and that is one small victory.

Saturday, we had three events: my sister's older set of twins turned 4, then there was a baby shower, then Jamie's family reunion. I was happy that all three were in relatively close proximity, with the last even down the street from our house. It helps that most of the road is family.

At the reunion, I was distressed for a baby who clearly wanted to nurse, but his mama told him, "Sorry, baby, there's nothing there anymore!" I'd say the baby was no more than 10 months old. :(

We were all instructed to take home leftovers and my SIL joked saying, "If you have any baby formula, I'll take that, cause that stuffs expensive!" I'm fairly sure I smirked and looked away.

I had a good conversation yesterday with Jamie's cousin when I went to visit her at the hospital again. She's never really known my parenting beliefs and why I'm usually quiet around family. It was just us in the room so we were able to talk without other people offering their opinions about baby stuff. It's amazing how many people become baby experts the minute a newborn starts crying. We also talked about homeschooling and why I chose to stay at home after Simon was born. She was surprised she didn't know we were going to homeschool, but I told her that I don't talk about it because Jamie's mom and I have had our differences on the subject. I'd rather just avoid talking about it if I'm going to have to defend it.

I made sure to tell her how proud I was of her for wanting to breastfeed. Cause I really am.

So many babies are being born these days, that it's SO HARD not to want to jump on the baby train! I'll wait though. We don't need another May baby. Like that's a good reason not to get pregnant right now. Ha.

Simon has been a mess the past week. His canines were coming in and then with all the running around we've been doing, it's been cling city. I couldn't even walk up to the pizza buffet at lunch the other day without him crying. Plus he's been nursing at least three or four times at night. It's exhausting. This morning, though, I vowed to try and give him some cereal in the mornings. The way I see it, if I give him breakfast everyday, I'm more likely to eat breakfast too.

I have no idea what I want to accomplish today.

I was going to start the week off with an entry about our mini-vacation with my dad, but I'm a little distracted by the article in the local newspaper. You'd think that I get tired of writing about these sorts of things, but now that I've received two emails about the article, I need to make a stink for a minute.

The article is about behavior that people find offensive such as talking loudly on a cell phone and noisy children in restaurants. At the end of the list is "breastfeeding in public." What I can't understand is how that even compares to any of the "boorish behaviors" listed in the rest of the article. They all involve disruption of some sort, either with noise or in the case of "changing a diaper in public," smells. On that note, the only time I've had to change a diaper in public was at the beach or in a place that simply didn't have a baby changing station.

I digress.

I don't make a display of nursing my child in public. It's not as though I scream "YOU WANT NURSIES?" when I can tell Simon's hungry. And I certainly don't take my shirt off or make a PSA whenever I'm undoing my nursing bra to give him a little snack. A lot of people will say that they don't have a problem with NIP (nursing in public) so long as the mother is being "discreet." By most definitions, "discreet" means "covered with a blanket." Not a single one of my babies tolerated being covered up for too long. They like to look at me while nursing and I can imagine it gets pretty stuffy under there.

If I'm not wearing a nursing shirt, the baby does a pretty good job of covering up whatever is showing. The only time someone may get flashed is if he pulls of suddenly and my nipple pops free. That's only distracting for someone who is watching intently and happens to catch the boobie shot before I cover up again. I'd invest in more nursing shirts, but they are ridiculously expensive. So there. People will just have to deal with my NIP without blankets and cover-ups.

Who can honestly say they would rather hear a screaming infant than see a mother cradling her baby and doing the most natural thing? Personally, I get peeved whenever I see someone poking a bottle of juice into a crying 4-month-old. The ignorance alone distracts me; I get caught up in my own thoughts and wondering why people don't educate themselves about infant nutrition.

Not everyone chooses to breastfeed their children. I get it. What I don't get is why people write stuff like in this article. I don't get why mothers need to defend themselves when it comes to feeding their babies the way nature intended. I don't get how people think breastfeeding is gross or abnormal.

So to people who think breastfeeding in public is boorish:

If you have a problem with my nursing in public, don't look at me. Focus instead on the parents beating their children in the middle of Wal-mart.

Until last night, I didn't realize how passionate I was about breastfeeding. I mean, I always knew that it was something I felt strongly about. It's obvious: I attend LLL meetings, I'm applying to be a leader, and I love giving advice to mothers and mothers-to-be.

I failed on behalf of my nephew-to-be.

My sister-in-law is due with her first baby in May. When she got pregnant, she said she didn't know whether or not she was going to breastfeed. Of course, I offered information. I brought her with me to a LLL meeting. I gave her books to read. I did everything I could without seeming obnoxious or intrusive.

But I failed.

We ate dinner with Jamie's mom, Jamie's brother and his wife. Before dinner, I asked my SIL if she needed a pump. She said no, that she's pretty much decided that they're using formula.

My heart sank and I calmly asked why. Here were her reasons:

• I won't have to worry about pumping every fifteen minutes at work
• My husband can feed the baby without me having to pump
• It'll be easier for my mom to feed the baby without me having to pump.

Despite all my efforts, she hasn't learned a thing. My sister pumped for her TWO SETS OF TWINS. And the thing, is I don't even think she's going to try. She'll be home for 8 weeks after the baby is born, so what's stopping her from doing what is natural and beautiful and BEST for her child? In my sister's opinion, my SIL wants a baby, but without all the responsibility.

I'm not saying that she's going to love this baby any less. I'm not saying that she's going to be a bad mother for choosing to formula-feed her baby.

What I am saying is that her reasons for formula-feeding her baby are completely selfish. I can't bring myself to understand or accept her reasons.

All I could do, though, when she gave me her "reasons" was say, "Okay," and just leave it.

When Jamie arrived at his mother's house (he had been at work), I was still in shock. So much so that I had to go outside to talk to him. At that point, I just started crying. I felt devastated for this baby, who will most likely be born by c-section because her OB told her she'll be induced if she goes one day over her due date. I felt devastated because I'm related to these people, they're about to be my next door neighbors, and they are the complete opposite of everything I stand for.

How can I learn to bite my tongue at family gatherings when they're shoving disgusting sugar-water-milk into this baby's system, stinking up the world with formula poop in his environmentally unfriendly Pampers? Don't get me wrong, I've contributed my fair share of disposable diapers into the earth's lanfills, but I'm making up for it now!

I'm happy for my sister-in-law and her new baby-to-be. I just can't be happy about the choices she's made regarding the health of her child. She is a selfish, selfish person.

In a perfect world, every woman would be able to breastfeed. In my perfect world, every woman would want to breastfeed their babies. I honestly don't understand why a woman wouldn't want to do what nature intended her to do.

There are a few things going on in the media that are making me furious.

The first is the reaction to Babytalk magazine's cover this month. What's the big deal? It's an infant nursing! You can't see any nipple (or it's been airbrushed out), and the baby looking up at its mother in adoration--beautiful!

Now, an article is floating around on the internet that quotes several people's reactions to the cover, and all of it is negative. I simply cannot understand how people can take offense to this. When it came out, the response from everyone in the forums I frequent was great! People wrote in thanking Babytalk for printing such a wonderful photo. Now that the negative feedback is coming in, the same people who praised Babytalk are now flaming the people who took offense. It's my turn.

What kind of a person is offended by a nursing infant? It's not sexual. Are some people so uncomfortable with the human body that they can't even look at something completely natural? I'm going to go ahead and assume that these people formula feed their children by choice because they think breastfeeding is, and I quote, "gross."

In my imaginary perfect world, every woman would be surrounded by and supported by women who have all "been there." After a medically unassisted home birth, she would snuggle with her brand new baby day and night. She would have her mothers and sisters with her to help her learn how to nurse, bring her food, clean up for her, and make the hardest first weeks & months a dream. Yes, breastfeeding can be difficult. Yes, there are extremely rare cases of mothers who do not make enough milk. In my perfect world, formula would be prescribed like medicines as a last resort and not given out for free. In my perfect world, a woman can stay home on paid maternity leave for as long as she wants, only to return when she knows she can pump milk at work for her baby. Or she would be able to bring her baby with her if she really felt the need to work.

In the free copy of Babycenter magazine, they print mothers' comments about a variety of different topics. Here's the quote that made me absolutely livid:

"Breastfeeding helped me lose a lot of weight--I lost my stomach in a month. But when I woke up one day with one boob way bigger than the other, I just said, 'That's it. I'm done with this.'"

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

Your breasts are not the exact same size to begin with. And on top of that, they change size all the time during the first months of breastfeeding. I've woken up to the exact same thing but my reaction was, "Well, I guess I'd better nurse on the giant boob first." They even out as the day goes on; it's not like they stay that way forever!

I feel terrible for people who can't nurse for medical reasons. But there are milk banks out there and so many women willing to donate their milk to mothers who need it. Instead of giving out formula, health departments should network with milk banks and help out these women and babies!

As for people who just give up on nursing because it's "too hard," I only wish there was a way to reach them and let them know there are people who can help. There are LLL groups all over the world and a HUGE amount of information on the internet.

Breastfeeding is not gross. It's natural. For those people who take offense when my baby is getting the best possible nutrition and you're shoving your face full of processed meats and greasy, tasteless vegetables, I want to say I feel sorry for you. I really do. But I don't. You just make me sick.